blogging gobbledygook and such

Everybody has their quirky habits, their idiosyncrasies that don’t make sense to you. Maybe you have a friend who colour codes their underwear. Maybe you get really cranky if anyone tries to speak to you the first hour after you’ve woken up in the morning.

This girl? She refuses to disclose her birth date to friends.

“Why you don’t want to tell me your birthday? You tell me, I can wish you happy birthday and get a gift mar.”

“Eeee, what’s wrong? Why cannot tell your birthday? Don’t like that la… I really want to know your birthday!”

“You tell me la, I promise I won’t tell anybody…”

Some friends actually felt somewhat insulted for self’s insistence to keep the birth date private! They would try to snatch self’s wallet to look for self’s identity card (which is kept somewhere else). They would cajole, coax, pout, persist but will be damned before ever break down and give the date!

It’s nothing to do with age. Am determined to be a person who is not shy about her age, even when she’s 46 and still single. Because there’s nothing wrong to be 46 and single. Anyway, yes, maybe am a little peculiar for refusing to tell friends the birth date. After all, almost everyone adopt a pretty liberal approach as to the divulging of their birth dates. So why is she so secretive about hers?

First, let’s see what birthdays connote to her. Birthdays connote a special day that celebrates the birth of a special person, a loved one. So a birthday of a loved one is a celebration of the existence of said loved one. Celebrations are something that’s important, looked forward to by many people and therefore, nobody ever forgets a celebration day. Nobody forgets when is Xmas, or Chinese New Year, or Thanksgiving. As such, a loved one’s birthday should be placed in the list of Dates to Remember.

The problem is, unless you’re a loved one by default (Reluctant Family Member, Best Friend Forever, Sugar Pie Honey Bunch, etc), chances are your birthday will be forgotten by a casual fair-weathered friend after the friendship has drifted apart. And if you’re someone like this blogger who really remembers dates, it can be very dismaying to know that you’ve taken the time and effort to buy a present for this friend whom you think is your good friend, but you know she does not feel the same way anymore because she has forgotten your birthday this year, which she has never done before in all the years of your friendship.

To self, this makes the whole ritual of revealing self’s birth date meaningless. Why bother asking when in the end you forget? It could be silly to place the condition of remembering self’s birthday as privilege only to certain people, but it is a silliness with a reason. It could rather unsporting not to tell your friends your birthday when they really want to celebrate your special day with you, not to mention that they had freely offer their birth dates when you have asked before, but it is what self believe is self’s right whether should please to reveal or otherwise. And above all, her refusal to divulge her birthday shows that she is not friends with you because she expects birthday presents from you. She is friends with you because she likes you, and the ability of you to remember or forget her birthday is disabled by her refusal to divulge because she appreciates your friendship that much that she does not want to jeopardise her friendship because of her idiosyncrasy!

Okay, you’re thinking that friendships should mean infinitely more than a remembered or forgotten birthday because that deed in itself can be done by anybody. You don’t have to be friends with Paris Hilton to know when’s her birthday.

If that’s the argument, then surely you don’t need to know self’s birthday to be self’s friend? 😉

Comments on: "Do you want to know when her birthday is?" (5)

  1. Plbtttttt!!! There is nothing wrong with color coordinating your undershirts and underwear as long as the undershirt does not overpower the color of the sports shirt. 😉

    Plus the older you get the more fun it is to make people mad at you because you refuse to tell them your birthday. 😀 (Besides it they are too inept to read your personalized car license then they do not deserve to know. (ROFLMAO at years of people fuming as they try to guess my birthday when it is right out in public view!!!!)

    sulz: gasp! … not you? 😛

    lol! that’s really ironic.

  2. gasp – not me what? whatever it was I did I blame it on someone else.

    sulz: mean it sounded as if you… colour-code your underwear… 😮

  3. Hummm, well when you are going out dressed in black (which is how I dress the majority of the time), I prefer to be in all black. Shirt, pants, shoes, socks and everything (including undershirt and underwear) but my Cubs’ baseball cap (they only come in medium blues, white and red mixes) is all black.

    sulz: have lots of black clothes and undies too! stains don’t show as much… 😛 😛

  4. I’d be the perfect friend for you for I never ask about birthdays which in turn is because of my great inability to remember days. I remember only those days on which the school remains closed 😛 So if you’re planning to do something so great that there will be a “Sulz Day” which guarantees me a holiday, I’ll damn sure remember your birthday. Another problem with birthdays is that when you wish someone, you’re expected to give a present too and me being me, I’m extremely lazy and almost always out of money.

    And I don’t feel birthday’s are anything really special. If you’re happy about someone being in this world, you can wish them everyday! Friends don’t really need a particular day or occasion to wish you do they? In my opinion, friends are a bunch of people who are crazy about each other and since they are crazy, you can’t really expect them to remember at what time and day you were born. I’ll come to your place anyday with a cake and alcohol in my hand and wish you happy birthday. I don’t care and I never expect my friends to remember my birthday either. It’s 20th of December by the way and now that I’ve told you and you’re into remembering dates, I want a present. Get that? 😛

    And before I forget, when is your birthday girl? 😛

    sulz: dream on, bacardiboy! 😛

  5. Yea, dreaming on birthday girl 😛

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