blogging gobbledygook and such

Change

This is the last week of my final semester. I feel so drained emotionally, not just because tomorrow will be the last official day of my semester of my college education, the last day of what I have been going through for the past three years, and the implications of it, but also because of the personal problems I’ve previously mentioned.

I’ve decided to do something about my life. I don’t want to do it, I’m terrified of doing it, because I’ve become so accustomed to the life I have now… but I have to grow up. I need to grow up, even if it means leaving people behind and struggling through life on my own.

It will be hard. I will cry out of longing, I will cry because I fear I can’t cope on my own. But I will have my friends, who will help me through what I expect to be some of the most difficult times in my life. And I will emerge a stronger and more independent person.

I have been through tough times like this. I know I can do it. It’s not like I’m going to die or anything.

I will tell you what I’m talking about tomorrow…

Comments on: "Change" (11)

  1. oh the antici…payshun! 😉

    Hun, I’m 40 yrs old, and I’m still growing, growing up (and sideways, but thats another poem). Life will be lived, and all you can do s make decisions which feel right for you. good luck, and clear thnking.

    sulz: haha! honestly, i’m not the sort of person who makes decision and feel right about it; i always doubt myself and wonder if i’m making the right decision.

    that said, i believe i should stand by my decision and even if it may not be the right one, it’s my decision to make and no matter how wrong i should be able to learn something from it at the very least.

    nice to see you here instead of at the forums usually. 🙂

  2. Hello there sweetie… the sunshine isn’t too bad cause got in when only one comment….good on you for making a decision for the future….it can be scary but scary exciting so am waiting with baited breath.xx

    sulz: 🙂 don’t hold your breath, it’s really not as dramatic as i wrote it out to be… but it’s definitely a huge step for me.

  3. Change is a part of life, it’s inevitable.

    It’s good that you’re confident and know that you can do it. With that kind of an attitude, nothing can come between you and success. Kick ass, sulz!

    sulz: ish, i’m far from confident. i’m terrified! i just feel i had to do it, even though i rather much stay in my comfort zone… 😦

  4. Change can be difficult, yes… but I’m sure that you’re the type of person that when you set your mind on something, even if it terrifies you, you do it.

    Remember what I shared with you not long ago:

    Climb high,
    climb far;
    your goal the sky,
    your aim, the stars.

    Best!

    sulz: thank you.

  5. oh my, I’ve been such a bad friend lately. I know I haven’t stopped by in like a week (just been busy – plus I blogged myself out covering Curlin’s world championship and doing the radio/podcast thing)

    The whole look has changed. Plus I now find out my cherished friend is going through a tumultuous time.

    I won’t lie to you and say it will be easy, nor will I lie to you and say you won’t long for the past sometimes, but I think you’ll be just fine.

    I come here because I know how smart and gifted you are. That’s why listening to your ramblings and musings and getting to communicate via comments is so enjoyable. It’s worth the time spent. I’m convinced that you’ll find lovers, friends, and employers who recognize your worth and want to hitch their collective wagons to you.

    Be brave, my good friend – but seize the day fo’ sho’! 🙂

    sulz: you’re not a bad friend, just a busy one, it seems. 🙂 thank you for the sweet compliment. *hugs* i wish those lovers would come quicker though, haha.

  6. Oh, your last line addressed my question: “whasshetalkingabout?” I shall be patient until you disclose. In the meantime, let me tell you I think you are very brave. You’ve reinvented yourself several times already, while still staying uniquely YOU! Not everyone can do that. Wherever you go; whatever you do; your companions will be lucky to have you. As are we. {{{sulz}}} 🙂

    sulz: thank you, that’s really sweet. 🙂 *hugs* i don’t feel very brave. but i’m taking necessary measures to make sure i don’t back out of what i’ve just decided.

  7. thebeadden said:

    Sulz. Just from reading your blog the short time that I have been here at WordPress, I know there won’t be much to stop you in life! You are creative, wise and thoughtful.

    You are a like gift waiting for the world to open you and let you grow! Good Luck and keep us posted!

    sulz: i really don’t feel like that! but thank you for your sincere compliment, that made me feel nice. 🙂 of course i will keep you posted, as long as you keep reading. 😉

  8. Changes is always the biggest obstacle in life. When human use to be in their conform zone, most people wont think of changing.

    Well, when think back of my passed few years, i have gone thru few stages of changes in my life.

    From study to work, from work to engage in a relationship and until recently planning to get marry…I have gone thru a hard time to reach until where i am right now.

    But yet, this is life right? it will be boring if you always feel happy and enjoy. Because of the changes and challenges, only we know how to appreciate the happy time we have.

    So Sulz, dont worry about the changes you gonna make, as long as you still alive, everything can restart even though you failed in the future! Kambateh!

    sulz: hi there, thanks for your comment. you’re right, but at the same time, it doesn’t make change any less hard to face. 🙂 anyway, i hope you will have a wonderful wedding! do you have a blog?

  9. Everyone would rather stay in their comfort zone, but that isn’t possible. And you realize your true potential and so many new things about yourself only when you step out of the comfort zone.

    sulz: but sometimes, you realise your limitations that way… i know, i should be more optimistic, shouldn’t i?

    just trying to come to terms with my decision!

  10. Gosh. Change can be so tough, can’t it? I admire your adaptability.

    And such inspiring comments people are leaving! There’s really nothing left for me to say, other than what’s already clear: that we all believe in you!

    Good luck!

    sulz: it is, tougher on me than it would be for other people, i think, because i’ve led such a sheltered life.

    i know, i’m so grateful for those comments and the faith shown in me. i wish i could convert them into courage and confidence, to be taken like a dose of medicine when life gets me down then!

    thank you, i’ll need loads of them. 🙂

  11. […] not readily donated to charity shops in my size I find. Okay I am a size 16/18 Australian….see Sulz it is not too hard to tell people your dress size, if I can admit to that then how difficult is it […]

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