blogging gobbledygook and such

I just spoke to my boss at the current job. Again, I asked the same question. Again, he gave the same reply. So I’m definitely stuck here in June. Has he found someone to replace me? Yes, pretty much! He’s hiring the person I replaced. The one who made my first two weeks at the job a living hell. Hoho, the irony…

Things at the office are unbelievably slow. The quarterly projects should be coming in by now but are not for some reasons or other. Which means I’m pretty much being paid to do nothing, read (openly as that is allowed by boss), play Facebook (secretly) and blog (not so secretly since you’re reading it, haha). Well, until the projects decide to flood in all at once and toss me into a frenzy.

I hate feeling unproductive. It’s one of the worst feelings to have as an employee, because you feel like a liability and the weakest link. On top of that, it’s hard to keep your eyes open and not fall asleep. I wish I can leave earlier, but they’re keeping me just in case the work piles on next month.

For all the negative emotions I feel thinking about this job, I did learn some things here. I learnt that I can do it, even if people – and myself – think I can’t. (I also feel my experience here built my confidence in dealing with people and believing that I am capable of doing a good job at the bookshop.) But most of my learning, I felt, were done the hard way – that is, through experience. My boss is too busy to help me figure out my job when I first started out. Also, I don’t get feedback on my performance, so I don’t exactly know what I’m good or bad at the job. Personally, I feel I do an okay job but one can tell my heart’s not in it.

Working at the bookshop will be no bed of roses either. Just yesterday I experience what it’s like when a new shipment of books arrive at the shop. Even though I had the easier job of pricing books and stacking them neatly for my colleague to shelve or display, it was tiring and hard work. I carried many piles of heavy books and when I woke up this morning, my arms ache terribly, the way my legs would after a whole day of shopping. It felt like I have arthritis or something!

That said, I enjoy myself far more at the bookshop. It is not without its flaws, its politics, its share of people who dislike me for reasons or other. But at the bookshop, I feel needed. I know my bosses are counting on me. The bosses are the friendliest among the bosses I’ve worked for, despite stories of their infamous tempers (which I have yet to witness). I feel comfortable with most of the colleagues, especially this one colleague and the supervisor. And of course, most of all is that I have passion and confidence for the job I will be doing there.

It’s hard to keep your head focused here when your heart’s already there.

Comments on: "The final mile is always the hardest" (7)

  1. Good going Sulz..

    I know what you mean when you say having no work and just sitting… I am doing just that at work. I am so desperate for a change now. I do not think that there will be any work coming in soon too!

    sulz: you too?? our work lives does parallel quite a bit, huh? i hope you find something to distract you during such times. have you been looking for other jobs? good luck!

  2. Pity the poor sucker who is going to take over YOU! πŸ˜‰

    sulz: let’s just say i could make things good and easy for him but i’m not! :mrgreen:

  3. It is indeed an irony when you go to work ans still end up doin ‘nothing’. Hope you can get things right at your end. Best of luck.

    sulz: oh yes, that too. it makes going to work so pointless. at least i get to catch up on my reading. πŸ™‚ thanks.

  4. You DID say you thought it might be an excellent idea for the former employee to come back! πŸ˜‰ Now, at least, you can leave with a clear conscience, that they will have a knowledgeable employee. Still, June will be a loooong month!
    Think of the bookshop as a good workout opportunity! Look at all that exercise you’re getting to tone up those arms! (Not that you need it, but you think you do.) πŸ˜›
    I’m sorry it’s boring at your main job now. But I’m glad you recognize things you’ve learned and can carry through to your next experiences!

    sulz: i did, when i thought it would be to my advantage. πŸ˜› yes, but since i barely have any work to do *cross fingers* i will make use of the time doing things i can’t find time at home – like wrapping my precious books with plastic covers. :mrgreen:

    the bookshop will make me do more physically for sure! the parking lot’s further and yes when shipment comes there’ll be lots of carrying of books!

    my ‘failure’ at my jobs made me realise that saying is true – you have to meet a few wrong ones before you find the right one. and what you did wrong with the wrong ones will make you do right with the right ones! or rather, any bad thing can be a good experience for the future. πŸ™‚

  5. Hey, dont worry too much about how its going to be at bookshop. Take one day as it comes. Remember to hav fun after work, that is what we work for.

    How are your hives?

    sulz: yes, i have fun at the bookshop for sure! πŸ™‚ hives still going on, though it’s not as bad as it used to be. taking less medication but i still need them.

  6. The Totton linnet said:

    Just popped in to say hello πŸ™‚ and I told you so :p I don’t know what about-but I expect I did !!!

    sulz: hey! it’s been a while. πŸ™‚ haha.

  7. Well, I think I am reading the posts in the wrong order! πŸ˜†

    sulz: haha yeah. you need to drop by here more often. πŸ˜‰

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