blogging gobbledygook and such

Archive for the ‘Blogging’ Category

In what might be my last post

I just want to say a heartfelt thank you to everyone who has ever commented in bloggerdygook. I’ve fought, cried, laughed, smiled, cheered, lived through this blog and through my interaction with you. Knowing some of you here has made a lot of difference in my life. It is so ironic that some of you who mean so much to me, I have yet to see your faces or shake your hands. Yet, I will remember.

… Okay, that was way too dramatic. It’s not like I’m cutting my online life out entirely! But in the event that I won’t ever resume blogging, I hope you know that I appreciate all your comments. Thank you for being in my life.

The end is near

I have been in two minds about a decision I’ve made a while ago, but I think this is the time.

I will not be blogging in August 2009.

I have grown very dissatisfied with my writing over the year since I’ve started working. I am not proud with most of what I’ve written and I’ve lost the passion to blog here.

I never thought this day would happen. I thought I would be blogging for a long time more. But one never knows what life will bring.

I’m not spelling the death of sulz. I will be keeping in touch with you, checking your blogs and commenting when I have something to say. And when I say I won’t be blogging in August 2009, perhaps I might pick it back up in September. I don’t know. But for certain there will be no posts in the month of August.

I think Project Rediscovering Blogging is a failure. If anything, it only succeeded in accelerating my giving up in this endeavour. So, let’s do the opposite and see if maybe I miss blogging enough to want to come back to it.

Tomorrow, I will put up a protected post for those of you who are interested to keep in touch with me beyond the blog. If you don’t receive an e-mail with the password from me but would like to, just drop a comment here and I’ll send it.

ps. If you’ve been wondering why I am so cavalier about revealing my birth date and even showing a picture of me… this is why.

A blogging dream

I have this dream that I would meet my blog buddies all around the world when I could visit their respective countries.

I’ve done that so far with Lovelyloey, though we met in Macau rather than in her country Singapore. But I have planned to visit Singapore by the end of this year to fulfill my New Year resolutions, so that’s one blog friend down…

Will I be able to fulfill this dream with other blog friends? Will I be able to keep in touch with them long enough while I save up and find the time?

I hope that even if we lose touch, we would remember each other… I hope when I visit your country, I will remember to visit you. I hope if you ever come to Malaysia, you will look me up as well.

bloggerdygook is being studied

Sarah Ford from the University of Massachusetts is doing a paper/thesis called Public & Private in the Blogosphere and I have agreed to participate in her study. Below are the questions given to me, which I’ve answered and she will follow up with an interview via IM later. Enjoy!

1. Tell me about the history of your blog. When and why did you start it? Why have you continued to maintain it?
I started bloggerdygook on 1 January 2006. Back then it was not called bloggerdygook. Took me a while to find a name that I’d stick with. It’s a weird-sounding one, but it fits for some reason. I have maintained this blog thus far because I like interacting with my readers and at the same time it’s very cathartic to talk about my life.

2. Why did you choose WordPress for your blogging software? What features attracted you to it?
I chose solely for the name. Really! It helps, of course, that it’s one of the best blogging platforms around for novices like me. I don’t want to care about the technical details, and this place help me do just that.

3. Have you ever changed blogging software? Why or why not?
Never will. For the kind of platform I’m looking for this is the best, so why bother trying out others when it’ll just probably disappoint me?

4. In terms of writing style, topics, etc., do you find that your blogging has changed over time?
Definitely. I used to be a more prolific blogger, if I could label myself that. Right now I don’t really like what I blog about, even though the subject has always been about myself!

5. Do you emphasize or de-emphasize any particular aspect of your identity / life in the blog? Why or why not? How much, if at all, has this changed over time?
This blog is about what I want to write, nothing more than that. I try to write according to what I think my readers want to read but at the end of the day it boils down to what I feel like writing.

6. What techniques do you use to protect your personal information in your blog? What about other people’s personal information?
I don’t give out personal information publicly, but if you knew me in real life you might be able to deduce from the things I talk about. When I talk about people in my life I give pseudonyms, change the sex, the time of events… most of the people who read my blog are either very close to me in real life or just online, so there isn’t much to divulge from the things I bitch about here!

7. Have you ever changed how much information you protect, or the ways in which you protect it?
As mentioned in previous answer. When I find it difficult to disguise the details of an event, I put it up in a protected post to allow people I trust in.

8. How much do you think about your audience? Do you often tailor posts to them, do you write with them in mind?
I appreciate my readers. They are one of the reasons I still blog today. I used to try writing with them in mind, but now I just write whatever I want because now that I’ve started working (from 2006 to 2008 I was in college) it’s hard to make an effort when you don’t have much time!

9. What do you think of readers who don’t comment? What about commenters who don’t blog? Do you consider those groups differently? Why?
I don’t know readers who don’t comment so to me it’s like they don’t exist. I won’t be surprised though if there are people who know me in real life are reading my blog secretly. I don’t know how to relate to these group of people so it’s easier to think they don’t exist, sorry to say that.

10. Your blog includes at least one protected post. How do you decide what material goes in a protected post, and who has access to that post? How do you decide whether or not to grant someone access to that post, and why are you so open about its existence?
What goes in a protected post are things which are very personal to me and I would not allow to be viewed publicly. This is not because I do not want random strangers to read my innermost secrets, but rather I’m afraid I might reveal my identity by doing so! So if someone which I’m pretty sure does not know me in real life were to ask to view these protected posts, chances are I’d probably allow him or her to do so.

11. How has your perception of public/private changed over the course of your blogging “career”?
Blogging is actually quite a private activity done on public domain. So it’s difficult to draw the line between private and public, other than personal details. What about personal thoughts, how private do they remain once you make them public? Basically, once you make something personal public, then it’s no longer private anymore and people can read and disseminate it.

12. Some people have suggested that blogging is an exhibitionist activity, and that reading blogs is a voyeuristic activity. What do you think of that?
In a way, yes, but that depends on what is the content of the blog in question. For bloggerdygook, I liken my reading as letters to a friend. I write about my thoughts in the way I would have liked to talk about them with a friend. And if you happen to have a response to what I’ve written, well then, I welcome what you have to say, friend. 🙂

13. Did you find that participating in this study had any impact on your blogging activities, or on how you think about public and private in relation to your blogging activities?
I believe I used up some brain cells for this questionnaire! 😆 I think I’ve thought about this issue in some way or other before, when my writing quality was much better than it is now, so not much of an impact there in that sense.

Difficult to move on

Wondering what I should write for today’s post, I looked through past posts of what I’ve written for inspiration. It would have been really nice if I could muster some philosophical musing like I used to, but alas it is not that today.

Today, it was a virtual walk down memory lane as I read those posts. Here is a quick link. These posts mean a lot to me because they recorded my thoughts during some of the best moments in my life. I am also proud of some of them because they reflected the way I thought and wrote, some of which were very heartfelt. I admired the way my personality was revealed with the words I had subconsciously chosen. Reading them now again, I can see how some people would disagree with my views, but I think what is more important is that I felt so strongly about my opinions that I was confident enough to voice them, even though they could be flawed in argument.

And in speaking of what my heart felt or wondered, I made many friends who related to my thoughts, some of which I am thankful to be friends still till today. They were a big part of the reasons I enjoy the experience of blogging because I didn’t feel alone with my thoughts.

Reading the archives is a bittersweet experience. Sweet because I recall the moments that brought me joy that is albeit temporary. Bitter because I contrast it with my current state of blogging and back then seems much more satisfactory than what is going on here now.

Am I always going to look back in sadness? I keep thinking about the past and go, “I wish I were back in college…” When will I move on? When will I stop wishing I were back in college? Because for all the wishing I can do, time cannot go back. And even I know that if I did go back to college for a Master (is it Master, Master’s or Masters?? I am very confused about this) degree it will not be the same. So why am I longing for something I cannot have again?

Even I have gotten over my last romantic relationship. Why can I not get over my college years? Why is it so difficult to be happy about my present life?

Because I miss the belly-aching laughter I used to have almost every day in class. Because I miss writing posts like the ones I linked in the above link. Because I miss learning about things that people don’t think it’s important but makes a difference to me. Because I miss having a carefree life, having time to read voraciously.

Sigh, here I go again.

After one week

I’m a bit late with today’s post but it’s still in time!

So I’ve been blogging every single day for a week now. Am I anywhere near rediscovering my passion for blogging?

I readily admit that I’m still talking far too much about my life than I would like. It is the simplest thing to write about since it is like talking to a friend about what you have been doing.

I’m wondering, though, is it such a bad thing to talk so much about myself? I justify the need to talk about myself here with two reasons. One, that this is my space and therefore I should have the freedom to decide what goes here, even if I don’t like it all that much! 😆 Two, because I don’t have another outlet to release but here. I have friends I am fond of and would readily tell about my life when we meet up, but unfortunately this does not happen on a daily basis. I am not close with my family. We talk, but I could never say most of the things I say here. I don’t have a boyfriend, whom I might meet more regularly than my friends and therefore be a confidante I can spill my thoughts to.

So bloggerdygook is the only place where my beautiful and ugly thoughts can go.

Do I still feel like blogging is a chore? Well, a little bit. It is something I keep in mind every day, like a daily task that needs to be done. However, I don’t think of it reluctantly or with dread. That’s an improvement, right? :mrgreen:

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